Thursday, June 30, 2011

Poked

I got a cortisone shot yesterday. Let me preface the remainder of this entry by saying I hate needles, which is odd because I have half my arm tattoo'd. But it's a different kind of needle - I am not a fan of anything that get's inserted*

I know people suffer worse things in life - my boy Mike went through countless tests when he had cancer, and Dom had his blood clot issue. I count my blessings everyday for my good health, but I need something to blog about, so shut up and read.

The needle that they jabbed into my side was the biggest goddamn'd needle I have ever seen in my life and this procedure was a little more complicated that I had thought. The doc warned me ahead of time that because my pain was in a tricky spot in the ribs, there was a chance, albeit slim, that the needle could hit my lung and my lung would deflate. Not particularly what I wanted to hear at the time, but nothing in life comes without some risks I guess. Fuck it. Stick me. So they drag an ultrasound machine** into the room and another doctor comes in to navigate while my docs pokes around with the needle. First, they gave me a numbing shot. Then, I feel him stick the needle in- no pain but just the odd sensation of a needle buried deep inside my muscle. He must have been in there for a good two minutes fishing around and I could feel the damn thing moving around. All the while, doc #1 is guiding doc #2 as if he's trying to parallel park a car -

"Slowly, slowly..."
"Ok a little right. Stop"
"Ok move over and try over here"

At one point doc #2 says to doc #1 - "Well there's a rib. Found it." Great, at least we got the hard part out of the job. If we can't find the rib, we got bigger problems yo***

He explained that with my injury, a cortisone shot is like a grenade **** - he throws it in there and peppers the drugs around a bit to get the greatest coverage.

So I got up this morning and ran- I figured I'll test her out and see what's doing in the ole' internals. I ran 4.9 with no pain at an average pace of about ~ 9:10. The only thing that "hurts" is the spot where he stuck the need and there's a nice bruise on the spot. I've been poked more times this week than a Chinese Hooker during the week of the Army-Navy game*****, between the shot yesterday and my tat work a few days back. And I am going in for more tat work today :)

* That's what she said
** Hey doc if you find a pair of gold cuff links in there, let me know. I've been looking for those for 2 weeks
*** Sounds like someone didnt exactly nail the basic anatomy classes in med school
**** Not sure how I feel about a doctor using the term "grenade" as a context for any type of procedure
***** Yes, I threw a chinese hooker reference in there. That's how I roll.

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